When I was a little guy the closest thing I had to an action figure were those small green soldiers that came in a plethora of different poses, but had all the flexibility of rocks. These days klds have 6-inch figures with multiple points of articulation. Many current action figures literally bend over backwards for their owners.

I can’t help but think those small green figures influenced a great many men to believe that becoming warriors was the best thing to do when they grew up. But how do today’s boys handle trying to measure up to the dimensions of these kind of figures? Even the men they are based on aren’t as remarkably well disposed.

Still, wrestling action figures are never as outrageously developed as superhero and the new G I Joe figures. All the steroids in the world could never help most guys morph into the types of physiques these fantasy figures possess. It’s ironic the miniature figures have the ability to make developing boys feel inferior by comparison. How sad that most of us will never measure up to these muscle-packed imitations of life. Rather than live out our own dreams we are compelled to identify with manufactured masculinity.

Art by Sean Monaghan

]]> http://superversity.wordpress.com/2012/06/02/superhero-humor-dept-bats-in-the-currency/feed/ 0 centaureg Bat-Cowled George by Sean Monaghan http://superversity.wordpress.com/2012/06/02/winners-6112/ http://superversity.wordpress.com/2012/06/02/winners-6112/#comments Sat, 02 Jun 2012 07:02:58 +0000 Centaureg http://superversity.wordpress.com/?p=21735 ]]>  

Alan Scott, Green Lantern of Earth 2, liplocks his lover Sam.

It’s official, DC had announced last month that a major superhero would be shown to be gay and here he is:

The Associated Press: Green Lantern relaunched as brave, mighty and gay.

Let’s hope this isn’t the last recognition he gets as a gay man on the pages of his comic.

DC’s Earth Two (Issue #2) will be released next week.

All photographs by John Clum.